When my little one started learning her first words- she rattled off "mom", "dad", "cow" and "apple", much to our joy. And then I caught her saying this one word when she was playing with her soft toys beside me. I was shocked. None of us had taught her this word- then how did she learn it?
The little one was involuntarily saying the word 'no' while playing and I was puzzled how she learnt the word. It all comes from us. From the minute she started crawling, I would scream a 'nooo' to make sure she didn't reach for the dusty corners. When she started walking, I made sure I used the word 'no' right, so that she would not walk into a slippery area.
I can recollect a thousand other instances where I would have used the word 'no' to my child, but not once did it strike me that it would go so deep into my child's head- so much so that it became one of her first words.
I speak for the fraternity of moms, when I say this. We only say the word 'no' to capture our child's immediate attention and to prevent them from anything harmful or dangerous. But could we actually get the message across in a better way? Honestly, it must be both boring and irritating for the child to hear the word 'no' too often! And not just that, they lose the interest and the curiosity to explore and learn new things, in the fear of hearing a ‘no’ from us. Is that really what we want from our kids, as parents?
Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish explain how small words and feelings that we exchange with our children leave a deep impact on the young minds in the book, "How to talk so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk".
Watching this video made me realise that and made me vow to myself about what I shall tell my child. Sometimes, the real intention is lost in the process of communicating and that isn't something you would want as a parent. Watch this video to know how your words communicate more than their actual meaning to your little ones! Join the #YesMom movement.